Sunday, June 12, 2005
Another Slip of Luck For the Week...not for the Weak
Aiseh men...just a few nights ago...i had an accident..a minor one that is...
On my way home i was calmly trying to accept that things just happened...and i did..
figured out on settling the guy's damaged and so forth...
Unfortunately some other people, just couldn't go on the same wave as you do..they refuse to succumb to what was unpredictably shouldn't have happened could've happened .Instead they they would rather go regretting the very moment before the unlucky incident that you chosed to do so...that you could've avoided it..if you did not *this and that*
The thing that i don't understand up until now even though i've spent some time thinking deeply into it, is that when i heard the words "paying for the guy's damage..wouldn't solve the problem"....then what does?...i mean of course, a little regret will come an impact, but from right where you stand after the incident...you have only a choice of a stepfoot forward to go,which is to settle it off, and get by with some package of regret and awareness .....but what you can't have is, to turn back the time, and choose not to go out that night...that's just how it is...
i was fighting the feeling of dispute towards the actions that i took...and i won, i did not succumb to anger when things didn't turn out to what you expected....but confronting another person who thinks the otherwise...i lost it, i was pissed....anger took over.. i was still trying to understand his logic which didn't turn out to be logical at all to me...so for that night...i didn't regret a single bit of moving on with life, but regret the whole process of losing to temporary temper.....
So today, good things in the morning....another gamelan performance...i got an enthusiast photographer ..who keeps snapping pictures of me...down to my every movements...up to the time while we finished performing, and i was packing the instruments...i felt uncomfortable..but conform to his interest and cooperate indirectly...in fact it is his passion...which i greatly support..taking pictures of real people in scenarios.....so be it...got some good payments today..which comes handy since my budget was slipping due to the accident...
So i went software hunting at low yat...met and old friend..having nice chat, and later discover that i lost my phone...hehe what's weird is...i remember the very last moment where i put the phone, from my jeans pocket to my bag...thinking it was safer...and before we left dome...we made sure nothing was on the table..hmm...so i guess..for the second time in the week..if it happens..it happens...i was dissapointed... but rather calm about it, i could retrieve back the number...which is a good thing...provided that i spend some money that i just got..which is the bad thing....hmm..money come and go man...just not your sanity please...so i guess this week is a whole process of testing my anger-proof shield...hahahaha..but i feel so calm..it's nice being dissapointed without getting angry...i appreciate this dissapointment more than anything...as it teaches me to be accepting towards things...i have accepted worst things than a slip of luck...
goshh..i promised myself to write shorter blogs...subtle words..yet powerful impact...but i just couldn't help it...it flows like water from the damp..who cares anyways....i just hope i'm not out of space limit in a shortwhile...
good night and day...
On my way home i was calmly trying to accept that things just happened...and i did..
figured out on settling the guy's damaged and so forth...
Unfortunately some other people, just couldn't go on the same wave as you do..they refuse to succumb to what was unpredictably shouldn't have happened could've happened .Instead they they would rather go regretting the very moment before the unlucky incident that you chosed to do so...that you could've avoided it..if you did not *this and that*
The thing that i don't understand up until now even though i've spent some time thinking deeply into it, is that when i heard the words "paying for the guy's damage..wouldn't solve the problem"....then what does?...i mean of course, a little regret will come an impact, but from right where you stand after the incident...you have only a choice of a stepfoot forward to go,which is to settle it off, and get by with some package of regret and awareness .....but what you can't have is, to turn back the time, and choose not to go out that night...that's just how it is...
i was fighting the feeling of dispute towards the actions that i took...and i won, i did not succumb to anger when things didn't turn out to what you expected....but confronting another person who thinks the otherwise...i lost it, i was pissed....anger took over.. i was still trying to understand his logic which didn't turn out to be logical at all to me...so for that night...i didn't regret a single bit of moving on with life, but regret the whole process of losing to temporary temper.....
So today, good things in the morning....another gamelan performance...i got an enthusiast photographer ..who keeps snapping pictures of me...down to my every movements...up to the time while we finished performing, and i was packing the instruments...i felt uncomfortable..but conform to his interest and cooperate indirectly...in fact it is his passion...which i greatly support..taking pictures of real people in scenarios.....so be it...got some good payments today..which comes handy since my budget was slipping due to the accident...
So i went software hunting at low yat...met and old friend..having nice chat, and later discover that i lost my phone...hehe what's weird is...i remember the very last moment where i put the phone, from my jeans pocket to my bag...thinking it was safer...and before we left dome...we made sure nothing was on the table..hmm...so i guess..for the second time in the week..if it happens..it happens...i was dissapointed... but rather calm about it, i could retrieve back the number...which is a good thing...provided that i spend some money that i just got..which is the bad thing....hmm..money come and go man...just not your sanity please...so i guess this week is a whole process of testing my anger-proof shield...hahahaha..but i feel so calm..it's nice being dissapointed without getting angry...i appreciate this dissapointment more than anything...as it teaches me to be accepting towards things...i have accepted worst things than a slip of luck...
goshh..i promised myself to write shorter blogs...subtle words..yet powerful impact...but i just couldn't help it...it flows like water from the damp..who cares anyways....i just hope i'm not out of space limit in a shortwhile...
good night and day...
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