Hemo-hemo...comes from a cartoon character which i've never seen before...
I've been reffered to that character recently because of it's name...Hemo = Emo(tional)....
i don't bother....when my nature of being a perfectionist is starting to kick off....i give criticisive comments...i observe thoroughly on people's mistake and tell them(which i usually ignore to avoid confrontations).... some resources suggested that i shouldn't do so....the feedback?....i'm now the emotional monster who needs the same emotional feedback from others to neutralize....
for a simple mistake...there comes a pang compensation of losing respect and trust....

Talking about perfection....i don't understand why the word was created afterall where in real, perfection doesn't even exist....It gets rather disturbing that people around me throughout this whole month are expecting me to be perfect....be a perfect gamelan performer, be a perfect student, be a perfect leader, be a perfect daughter, be a perfect friend, be a perfect teacher, a perfect sister, a perfect housemate, a perfect tenant, a perfect apprentice, perfect human.....I don't wanna be perfect....I can NEVER be perfect...so can't you......asked to be perfect is also an obligation...which indirectly doubles up the responsibilities that i'm currently taking care of....

I do too much....but i never once thought i'm perfect in any......my perfectionist characteristics are some kind of sparks that ignites me to have the ability to do that something..i must do i-i can do it....not a flame that burns the house down...not the candle even....I'M NOT PERFECT in everything i do....if that's any consolation for those who thinks i am or think i want to be....it's so freaking easy for me to admit this .... then why is it so hard for you?